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Sex Contest & WHY MASTERBATION IS BETTER THAN SEX
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Sex Contest & WHY MASTERBATION IS BETTER THAN SEX - 09-12-2008, 01:46 AM

Sex Contest
Two guys drove to a gas station for a fill-up because they heard about a contest being offered by the station to patrons who purchase a full tank of gas. When they went inside to pay, the men asked the attendant about the contest.

"If you win, you're entitled to free sex," said the attendant.

"How do we enter?" asked the men.

"Well, I'm thinking of a number between 1-10, and if you guess right, you win free sex."

"O.K., I guess 7," said one of the guys. "Sorry, I was thinking of 8," replied the attendant.

The next week, the two same guys returned to the same station to get gas. When they went inside to pay, the one fellow asked the attendant if the contest was still going on.

"Sure," replied the attendant. "I'm thinking of a number between 1-10, if you guess right, you win free sex."

"2," said the customer.

"Sorry, I was thinking of 3," replied the attendant, "Come back soon and try again."

As they walked back to the car, the one downtrodden fellow said to the other, "You know, I'm beginning to think this contest is rigged."

"No way" insisted the other. "My wife won twice last week."






WHY MASTERBATION IS BETTER THAN SEX

* You don't have to look your best.
* You never have to say "I love you", promise to mow the lawn, buy flowers/dinner, lie about the size of your hand's, etc.
* If you use your other hand it feels like someone else.
* You can use both hands and have and orgy.
* You don't have to promise to call in the morning.
* As long as you're careful you'll never end up with the wet spot.
* You can make it last for hours, if you do it a certain way.
* You can do it wherever there is a public toilet which has a private cubical.
* You don't need to make an appointment in advance.
* It doesn't really make you go blind, not unless your hand slides off the end and you poke yourself in the eye.
* It's cheaper...you don't have to use those pesky condoms.
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09-12-2008, 07:04 AM

LOL never heard the contest joke before, thanks for the laugh
   
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09-12-2008, 05:30 PM

contest joke is hilarious
   
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09-12-2008, 08:11 PM

Those are old, but still deserve a chuckle.
And hello munkie
   
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09-13-2008, 12:38 AM

haha nice joke
   
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