Some Misc

happy173 · **Some Misc -** 04-07-2003, 12:43 PM

A former prostitute with a rather well-used vagina that has been somewhat stretched is given a proposal of marriage by a man she meets in a bar one night. She thinks it over, and she decides to accept his proposal.
Her private parts are somewhat oversized from her former occupation, but she decides to approach the problem after they are married. On their wedding night, she explains the problem by saying that when she was a small child, she got her privates caught on some barbed wire while climbing over a fence, which explains why her vagina is so big.
They make wild and passionate love for most of the night, and in the early hours of the morning, her husband, after regaining his breath, turns to her and says, "I can understand your private parts being stretched by this barbed wire, my dear, but just HOW far across the field were you before you noticed??"

A fellow was shipwrecked with six lovely women who in a short time were fighting over his attentions. They held a meeting to resolve the problem and decided that each would have his services on a different day of the week, with Sundays off for him.
In due time the guy was dragging himself through the week, looking forward to Sunday.
As he lay an the beach one day he saw a dot floating on the sea which as it got closer turned out to be a man on a raft. With his last ounce of strength he swam out, pulled the raft ashore, gave the occupant CPR and as he came around said to him; "Oh man, am I ever glad to see you!
"Goodness gracious, am I ever glad to see you too" said the raft rider in a swishy way.
With a shrug of resignation the guy said... "Oh damn, there goes my Sundays!"

A woman is crossing the road when she gets run over. She is lying on the ground as the driver rushes out of the car to her.
"Are you alright?" he asks her.
"Everything is just a blur, I can't see anything" she says.
Concerned, the man leans over the woman to test her eyesight.
"How many fingers have I got up?" he asks.
"Oh No!" she replies,
"Don't tell me I'm paralyzed from the waist down as well!!!"

bagger · 04-07-2003, 01:06 PM

Nice ones!! Thanks!!

adzee · 04-07-2003, 01:21 PM

LMAO at the prostitute joke!! Thanks happy!!

**Speed Daemon** · 04-08-2003, 05:12 AM

Good ones!

**Fujitsu** · 04-08-2003, 08:22 AM

siggy · 04-09-2003, 10:32 PM

LMAO. Keep em coming happy. Some great stuff here.

gfedcba · 04-10-2003, 07:54 AM

LOL..............nice jokes..............