Merry Xmas (oh bugger ! I missed it)

**Tweety** · **Merry Xmas (oh bugger ! I missed it) -** 01-02-2003, 01:16 PM

To all those people that missed Christmas due to over consumption of alcohol; it was rather good or so I’m told as I to missed the event. I woke up on the 25th (I was told this was the day) at about 18:00 hours. Why I woke at that time I will never know,,,someone invited me to a party on the 24th but I never did catch the reason for it, so I just turned up. In actual fact I wasn't really invited but it seemed like a good idea at the time. Anyhow the wife gave me a pair of house slippers at about 18:03, for some reason that, at the time, wasn’t quite apparent I said, “Thanks darling”. It must have been the condescending tone in my voice as she’s now sleeping on the sofa. This is rather nice as I get all the bed to myself.
Anyhow I digress from the real story. What actually happened to Christmas? I do distinctly remember seeing Christmas trees in the town centre but I’m sure this was three months ago! Surely Christmas finished about two months ago and can’t possibly have been dragged out for three or four months. Turns out that my Visa card had one hell of a Christmas as it seems to have been out for three Chinese meals and bought a woman’s handbag from a shop called TODS. Now upon further investigating it seems that these bags (if they can be described as such) are VERY expensive. In fact I think it came, not only with its OWN bag, to put the handbag into (go figure) that I must surely have been delivered by chauffeur drive Rolls Royce. The fact that I paid for the offending item makes me even more convinced that I missed the event of Christmas completely. Either that or someone slipped Rophynol into my drink on the 24th and then shafted me up the arse, now I have my Visa bill I feel rather sore for some strange reason. I have a few unanswered questions but the one burning question is how I ended up with a pair of house slippers and she end up with a fcuking expensive bag. I rather think that us men foke get the smelly end of a rather shitty deal. Anyhow sat here with very warm feet and a sore arse my final words are,

What happened to Christmas?

**Ben Turpin** · 01-02-2003, 02:45 PM

lol.. Merry Xmas Tweety

Sounds like you had a really... great... one?

nenesse · 01-02-2003, 03:00 PM

Tweety my friend, U are (how do U say in english ?) a "talkative" person !!

I like the way U are !
Don't change a thing !!

bagger · 01-02-2003, 04:04 PM

Looks like a Klingon Party to me....with a lot of Romulan Ale and Klingon Bloodwine. However we are allready in 2003.....Happy New Year!!!

**Speed Daemon** · 01-03-2003, 02:31 AM

Hmmm...I don't know...

An individual has been spotted in my area on occasion with an enormous handbag chock full of expensive nick-nacks and sporting a rather - shall we say - "generous" waistline.

By chance, did "she" have a fancy red convertible with eight tiny chauffeurs?

Contract_Killer · 01-03-2003, 07:55 AM

Poor Tweety

Enjoy the following xmas my friend

Zod · 01-03-2003, 08:52 AM

LOL

It goes by fast if you do not stop drinking to see whats going on

blue meanie · 01-05-2003, 11:16 PM

Too much John Smiths I take it, anyway you being from Yorkshire means you will be ironing the decorations for a couple of months, so that should remind you he, he !!!