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guess my age - thatīs a funny one |
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SSF Silver Member
Status: Offline
Posts: 846
Join Date: Mar 2003
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guess my age - thatīs a funny one -
06-16-2003, 02:11 PM
A woman decided to have a face lift for her birthday. She spent $5000 and felt really good about the results.
On her way home she stopped at a dress shop to look around. As she was leaving, she said to the sales clerk, 'I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?' 'About 35,' was the reply. 'I'm actually 47,' the woman said, feeling really happy. After that she went into McDonalds for lunch and asked the order taker the same question. He replied, 'Oh, you look about 29.' 'I am actually 47!' she said, feeling really good. While standing at the bus stop she asked an old man the same question. He replied, 'I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I was young there was a sure way of telling a woman's age. If I put my hand up your skirt I will be able to tell your exact age. 'There was no one around, so the woman said, 'What the hell?' and let him slip his hand up her skirt. After feeling around for a while, the old man said, 'OK, You are 47.'Stunned, the woman said, 'That was brilliant! How did you do that?' The old man replied, 'I was behind you in line at McDonalds.' |
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Smart old man tho eh? 
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SSF Silver Member
Status: Offline
Posts: 846
Join Date: Mar 2003
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06-16-2003, 02:31 PM
and here a litte bonus:
Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger. They tried and tried to get the door open, but they couldn't. The girl with the coat hanger stopped for a moment to catch her breath, and her friend said anxiously, "Hurry up! It's starting to rain and the top is down." |
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SSF Silver Member
Status: Offline
Posts: 846
Join Date: Mar 2003
|
06-16-2003, 02:32 PM
and here a second bonus:
Two cowboys are out on the range talking about their favorite sex positions: One says, "I think I enjoy the rodeo position the best." "I don't think I have ever heard of that one", says the other cowboy, "what is it?" "Well, it's where you get your girlfriend down on all fours, and you mount her from behind, and you reach around and cup each one of her breasts in your hands, and then you whisper in her ear, "Boy, these feel just like your sister's" and then you try to hold on for 8 seconds." |
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